I’m in a great place now, but last week I was physically tired and struggling with staying positive. The haunting phrase, “If I had hands that worked, I could…” started worming its way back into my mind. It was not good and certainly not pretty as complaints started frequenting my lips. For many years when this phrase would take hold, I would immediately surrender my frustration to Jesus and then start doing as St. Paul suggests in Philippians 4:8 “whatever is true, noble, right; whatever is pure, lovely, admirable; if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things.”
But for some reason last week I couldn’t hold on to it. I was tired of the mental challenge of “thinking about such things” and the victim mentality was taking over. I knew I was in trouble. Rolling into what I call my “prayer space” near the fireplace in our family room, I bowed my head. After sharing my aching heart with the Lord and telling him I was having a hard time reaching for what was true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, I took a big breath and quieted my mind. Lord, blow your grace into my heart and my mind this afternoon. I don’t want this worm to create a hardened heart. Your Word has always been my light, my guide. Why can’t I “think about such things” this afternoon as I have before? I’m here to rest in You.
After sitting quietly in His presence, taking several deep, slow breaths, a new sense of calm entered the room. The Holy Spirit flooded into my thoughts. “Be” what Paul says to think about. Be it right now. Don’t only think about it – be it. Be in the middle of such things. At first I didn’t know how to do this. But I simply centered my thoughts to the concept of all things true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable. What beauty came to my mind! What lovely images! Beautiful trees, sky, mountains, ocean, sun, peace, quiet, smiling friends. Your images may be different, but equally lovely when we center ourselves in God’s excellence.
Be.
Be.
Be.
Thank you Jesus for saving me once again from my own mental destruction and thank You for reminding me to come into Your Holy Presence.
Dearest Renee, I have been following your music career almost since it began. I can’t remember the dates….getting old I guess. I love to hear you sing. I have been listening to Family Radio for over 35 years. When I bought your tapes and CD’s I wrote Family Radio and told them what a wonderful singer you are! Now when I hear your songs on Family Radio I wish they would play more of them. Your voice is unmistakable. It’s so full, rounded and just beautiful! I played your tapes over and over again when I used to ride on my husband’s motorcycle. I learned to sing your songs and emulate the emphasis you give at certain points in a song. After church one Sunday, a lady sitting behind me and another sitting and in front of me said I sang so beautifully. I immediately told them that I was just singing the song the way you sing it. They invited me to join their choir, I was so surprised and honored to join the choir. I wasn’t able to because of ill health. Shortly after, I learned from the Bible that God has finished using the local churches p to spread the true Gospel that was around 1988. We were to come out of the churches and individually spread the Gospel. This is spoken of in many of the books of the Bible in both the new and old testaments. Just as God was through using the nation of Israel, He is done using the churches. They have become all apostate, everyone, teaching what is not in the Bible but what they have taken out or added to.
I miss singing those wonderful songs hymns, unless I sing with one of your CD’s I can begin to hear my voice maturing. After all I am 68 years old. But the sound seems to be better as I mature, more even and I’m able to hold the notes out longer and fuller.
I want you to know that I love to hear you sing. I have all your songs, tapes and CD’s and the book you wrote about how your accident happened. It just goes to show how God can work in anyone’s life. The quality of your singing is just so very special, I would recognize it anywhere. I thank God for you, Renee and I continue to pray for you and your beautiful family.
A friend passed on your blog to me, and the first article I read was about your need to Be. I am a new Grandma, and when my daughter-in-love asked me what I wanted to be called, I knew right away I wanted my grandchild to call me~ “B”
I love the call to Be~ and the Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God.
I will tell my grandchildren that my faith has taught me that life is best lived when we embrace our call to Be.
Be Free my Friend,
Holly